I need to decide whether to give up on my marriage or work to save my marriage. I am faced with this decision because my wife cheated on me. I do still care for her and I think she still has feelings for me. This is a difficult decision.

When a married person discovers his or her partner is involved in an illicit relationship, it seems like the end of the world. It triggers of sense of betrayal, abandonment, and loss of trust. The guilty partner can also experience a sense of devastation at the possibility that this reckless behavior may have forever alienated a still beloved spouse.

Marriage counselors can also sometimes help marital partners find answers inside themselves. While one should not look to excuse a partner's illicit affair or take the blame for that affair on oneself, it may also be true that both partners had a hand in sabotaging the relationship. It can sometimes be important to look at the relationship before the unfaithful behavior to discover how it ended up where it did.

"I think our marriage can get through this. I decided that I'm just going to carry on and ignore it in order to save my marriage." "She's a good person; I'll deal with being bored; I want to save my marriage." Suppressing your feelings about a spouse's affair and forcing yourself to be content with the hand you've been dealt isn't really saving your marriage. Making empty promises to be faithful and faking your satisfaction also probably isn't the most effective manner in which to deal with what has happened.

A common erroneous assumption is that love and satisfaction of basic needs are sufficient to maintain a marriage. Maintaining any marriage, even one that appears to be happy, requires serious work. Non-verbal and face-to-face communication are important determinants of success in a marriage. A therapist with a specialty in marriage counseling is a good resource to consider if a couple finds that maintaining open and healthy communication is too difficult.

You might be in a situation where your spouse does not wish to attend therapy. This should not dissuade you from trying it out. A quality professional can deal with your deeper issues and make you mentally healthier. Such improvement will decrease the likelihood of small arguments in the household, which is a great first step toward dealing with couples issues.

Used to be, in the old days, that marriages lasted forever; "'till death do us part" actually had a binding meaning and people grew old together...for better or for worse no one went around asking how to save marriage. Seems like those days are over, marriages last less and less everyday and people often find themselves asking how to save my marriage? One way to save a marriage is to work it out. Negotiation is very important while working out problems. Marriage counselors help married couples work through their problems and differences. Even though they may seem expensive, they are well worth it if they can help save your marriage.